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Writer's pictureThinnk Therapy

How Lost Am I?

lf I ask how lost are you? What would be your reply?. How often do you feel the need for external validation? And if you do not receive it, do you feel disheartened? You are not alone in feeling this way. External validation is an epidemic that our society is facing as a whole, a stark disconnect from ourselves is at the root of crumbling self- belief. A young boy, sweet, happy and vulnerable, looks towards his guardians for validation, for praise for his accomplishments. A child joyously and with extreme excitement presents his father with a report card, attaining full marks for a recent exam. The father in shared excitement praises the boy saying that he is proud of him. Although what the father said in hindsight is through good intention, and might not seem wrong but it has set the kid on a path of external validation for the rest of his life. What the father should have said was “You should be proud of yourself for attaining such great marks”. The boy does not explore it’s source, and ends up becoming lost in this whirlwind of a process, where his internal needs for validation need to be met by someone else.

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